On my ride home from work there is a boat stuck between two trees in the middle of a horse pasture next to a riverbed so dry it’s filled with grass. I think the boat is me. I feel for the boat every time I see it. Turned on edge, waiting for a river, which doesn’t exist anymore and may never exist again. Placed on edge for protection, not comfort. Although having my bottom rot out, well, let’s just say might be more uncomfortable. What good will I be even if the river runs again since I’m fenced in? My sponsor says I shouldn’t ask any question which starts with the word ‘why’. You know my reply.
If my Higher Power has a plan…if it includes a river and a fence… if I’m in this plan, me, the rowboat…I just don’t see it. Not seeing my purpose in life is a theme in my life says my sponsor. I don’t tell her the theme in hers.
Truth is, I don’t want to face the fact I might float away. Even though I’m supported by two big trees. Even though there is a tall fence all around me. Completely in spite of the fact THERE IS NO WATER! My Higher Power loves me. I am the boat.
Enjoy the flowers and slide on the snow.
It All Points to Joy
Can Love reweave the fabric which hate destroys?
Can Kindness resew the field
torn through with disregard?
Can Beauty paint the world anew
after so much ugliness has rained down upon us?
My heart believes these three cannot fail
to make things right
for what other point could there be than Joy?
You are reading selections from Sober on the Way to Sane and More Lines From My Life by Sherrie Theriault