I have learned I don’t have to answer just because someone asks. I have learned to change subjects. I have learned it is better to say nothing. Repeating the phrase, ‘it’s just my opinion,’ followed with, ‘I could be wrong,’ has proven insufficient. Somehow things frequently turn out worse than I expected but, as of yet, none have turned out better; this upsets. People become angry when I am correct; they are less angry when I’m silent. I tell the truth and trouble follows. I didn’t get sober to lie. So, I keep my mouth shut. There is no reason to distress folks, and reality has a way of doing that. Silence is my new defense. I hide inside of it and find my new freedom. Unless it concerns my sponsor, my sponsee, or my cherished friend, battening down the hatches saves me from a tempest and spares others their outbursts.
Persuade yourself to breathe.
My active voice is the elixir of fire
my addiction would have me snuff
in order to keep us hidden from each other,
me hidden from you, you hidden from me
and no one noticing you or I pouring the drinks.
Minus my active voice
I slip easily into unconsciousness,
my effectiveness doused.
My active voice is the light in my room
the candle in my window,
the glow within me,
which illuminates my days as well as my nights.
Moving ever forward the gyroscopic precision
of this voice never fails me
if I keep my “listening ears” turned on and tuned in.
My active voice is and will always be
the live wire connection of my Higher Power
uniting with me through people, places and things.
My effective conscience
is everything that results from this bond.
I run at an unfathomable rate of efficiency
when my active voice is on,
my feet fail to touch the ground as I fly to right action,
The nature of my effective conscience
is just that, nature,
as natural as if I were not carrying a fatal malady,
but instead possessed the secret to serenity,
which in fact I do: sobriety.
You are reading selections from Sober on the Way to Sane and More Lines From My Life by Sherrie Theriault