So, you stepped into a hornets nest and now how am I to respond? Blame you? No, I don’t think so, I mean you are the exterminator and some stings are to be expected, but this is far beyond even your honed ability to anticipate wasps. Cry, running from this ambush? Again, I decline I still want you after the war is over, even if I can not fight by your side. Protest, I try to refrain, I never want to make your job harder but I don’t want to leave the impression I have no concern, so I walk the fine line. Standing on the sidelines is harder than you think, I am helpless and lonely, not as exciting as your work and no comfort from this distance. I must hold my breath while you provoke the bees.
Stack your honest intentions as a hedge against a cold winter
I feel confused by the difference between love and war
The intensity and rush are too much
For my frazzled and betrayed emotions to sort out.
I feel like a Trojan person
I have all these children holdup inside
And they are waiting for peace and safety
So they can come out and sleep
For a time I allowed them to leave
For bathroom breaks one at a time
This was not a workable solution.
When these tykes would have a look around
They started to set fires and break hearts
Each child makes life a battleground
Fights and claws her way across the living landscape.
I must heal my insides from the center of my thoughts
Not send fragments of me to blend
With the unfamiliar and hostile world
Only when I can stand together
With my mind and heart safe within my being
Will I see a way to make love on my own terms
And leave war alone.