THINGS WHICH ARE THICKER THAN WATER
“Pudding, mud, ice cream, cement, sauce, paint, sap, drool, gravy, wood.”
“What is that?” I ask my sponsor.
“A list of things thicker than water. There are so many; why do people get so hung up on blood?” responds my sponsor.
“Survival? Or maybe comfort? Tradition?” I counter.
“I’m sure you’re right. I’m sure there are many benign reasons why we strong-arm one another into relationships with family we may or may not be ready for.”
“You mean the families we drank with?”
“Or sometimes drank to get away from. But it’s not the family; it’s us. We have to learn to do what we need to do. We can’t force ourselves into relations with anyone for any reason other than it’s what is best for our sobriety. Shoulds and oughts have no place in the family situation.”
“So I can just walk away from them one and all?”
“You can’t do anything in that sweep of the wand. In the same vein, don’t obligate yourself to people due to viscosity.”
“Got ya. There has to be a real choice made.”
“Sounds like a promising start.”
Have what you want unless all you want is MORE.
The Dark Fantastic
When the tornado touches down worry ends;
the anticipation is over and thought stops.
Tragedy is funny that way.
In the aftermath I find out what mattered
and what didn’t;
whether I have helped or injured myself
trying to plan for the worst.
I fail to realize there are cloud filled days
when nothing happens
and days when trouble comes from out of the blue.
What matters ultimately is if I was happy yesterday
all the way into today until the thunder struck.
Greed is not: living for today;
greed is my attempt at gathering the future
while dragging the past.